Congratulations to Tory MP John Moocow for landing the 'job' as Speaker of the House of Commons. I'm sure it will take him a while to wash the gravy off while he's wallowing in the gravy-train. I still stand by the staff here at the Towers' idea of the Speaker being a member of the public. I get the feeling he is dillusional as he talks about having great responsibility, who is he, Spiderman ?
A sharp-eyed staff writer here has noticed that Harrods owner Mohammed Al-Fayed has backed a residents opposition to a local landfill site. Quoted as saying "no one can take on that financially, I am taking them on though" Pardon? What are you on about man? Apparently the material going into the site is inert and does not produce any gas, unlike Mr Harrods, who produces more verbal flatulence than the average bovine.
RBS are planning to 'refinance' Liverpool FC's £350M of debt, in the current financial climate you have to ask yourself where this money is coming from? the millions of customers who get massive bank charges every month I'll bet. Surely they owe the taxpayer that money back? Can you imagine Chancellor Darling's face when he read this? Considering he looks like Steve Martin on a bad day already, I'd expect his telepathic eyebrows were working overtime to calm him and the rest of the Treasury down. If only is £350m to wipe the town of Liverpool off the map, dirty scouse scumbags.
Maybe an idea for the Government to raise some cash is to promote and heavily tax Whale-watching, although it's been a while since I've seen James Whale, I'm sure he'd be worth watching for five or ten minutes, according to sources, the industry is worth billions.
And finally, there is talk of the annoying grunting at Wimbledon to be punishable during matches, the Umpires have agreed to stop it.
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